“Over-controlled by anxious, fearful parents, these children often become anxious and fearful themselves”, Susan Forward
Recently a commentator on one of the blogs wanted more of my personal information. She said that I was prone to write about others rather than myself. This, of course is true, although I have leaked a few lived experiences of my own over the course of writing these fibromyalgia blogs for many years. First, I want to point out that fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue are caused by trauma that needs to be addressed early in life and only talk therapy will begin to help our suffering. This is why I am sharing my own childhood experiences that have set me up for anxiety, panic attacks and night terrors.
“When anxious people anticipate something bad about to happen- such as being confronted with creepy pictures of snakes or spiders- their right frontal insulas go into overdrive”, Blakeslee and Blakeslee
“The happiest women, like the happiest nations, have no history”, George Eliot
I have based my unproven theory about why more women than men are diagnosed with fibromyalgia upon a feminist analysis of the political and cultural roles of women in societies in general- both historically and at present, and how gender is socially constructed. I have not changed my mind on this issue, but it is indeed more complex than that. However, I have begun to look less at statistics in regard to the ratio of women to men because I believe that fibromyalgia is a catch-all term that includes both genders who suffer from chronic pain and that it is under-reported by men. In my view the concept of fibromyalgia developed as more and more women began to speak out about similar characteristics and symptoms which encouraged physicians to deem that it was primarily a condition that afflicted more women than men. There isn’t any way to be accurate about how much of the population of any country has fibromyalgia. In many places there isn’t even a term for the condition; more to the point many men are hesitant to report the symptoms to a health care professional for fear of being seen as less masculine. There is little doubt that for bi-sexual and transgendered people the issues are even more complex.
It is widely known that women, more so than men, are more prone to seek medical attention for both their families and themselves. Furthermore, women are generally more sensitive to bodily changes and other nuances that are often difficult to describe. An example of this is the reported “sense of impending doom” that women often experience weeks or days before a heart attack (I can attest to that!). Yet, when women mention to their health care providers symptoms that should be suspiciously attributed to heart disease, there is still a general misconception that heart disease is primarily a man’s condition. Conversely, when a woman discusses her chronic pain, fatigue and other symptoms, the label of fibromyalgia is more readily applied. If a man admits to having chronic pain the affected areas are more likely to be vigorously examined and attributed to, for example- a disk, muscular strain and so on. It is my view that emotions, in particular, anxiety, is responsible for fibromyalgia. Since emotions are culturally and socially defined girls are perceived to be sensitive and emotional whereas boys are rewarded for being dominant. However, the differences are in how emotions are expressed rather than experienced.
” The truly gripping thing about anxiety had alwaysbeen how physical it was”, Daniel Smith
I have little doubt, but no absolute proof, that anxiety is the root cause of fibromyalgia. I know many anxious persons who do not have fibromyalgia, but I do not know any person with fibromyalgia who does not suffer the plague of anxiety. It could be the chicken/egg dilemma but I suspect fibromyalgia is the result of long term anxiety which shows itself in the form of body pain, among other physical manifestations. The book featured here by Daniel Smith, while somewhat a bit too sexually graphic at first reading, is one in which anxiety in the extreme is presented honestly and sometimes overwhelmingly. It is a sad, yet funny documentary about the many ways in which this condition can affect our bodies very dramatically.
“Open your heart to your suffering”, Toni Bernhard
There can be little doubt that those of us with fibromyalgia/chronic fatigue have challenges that have forced us to live life differently than those who have ‘health privilege’ (a term I am unashamed of borrowing from Carolyn Thomas- www.myheartsisters.org). Often thought of as malingering, hypochondriac, weak, attention seeking, depressed people we often live in quiet desperation. By now we recognize that we have developed these conditions because of an over-stimulated nervous system which cannot sustain itself in a healthy manner any longer. It is as though we have over stretched the central nervous system just as a rubber band might become less elastic after constant over stretching. Whatever normal is, our hyperaroused nervous system is suffering from years of responding to stimuli that are too overwhelming for our sensitive natures and has become functionally abnormal . In spite of the fact that fibromyalgia is not a disease, but a dis-ease, perhaps precipitated by an illness or accident, or long-standing stresses from general life experiences, we have become chronically ill because of the pain, fatigue and myriad of other symptoms with which we are faced.